Post by cal on Jan 10, 2009 17:00:44 GMT -5
--open
The classrooms were generally empty whenever a class wasn't being held. Devoid of anything resembling life, except for, perhaps, the scuttle of an insect or small mammal.
Cal had counted on this.
His loyal squad of animals: Twiddle the duck, Twitch the Ferret (also known as Flyff), and Jolt the turtle sat on or near desks. Jolt had clearly gotten confused, and wandered off his seat. Now he lay on his back on the floor, stubby legs kicking the air. Twiddle just looked confused. Twitch looked bored.
"Now, today we're going to go over the advanced mechanics behind love. I call it..."
Cal underlined a huge word on a huge blackboard:
"LOVECANICS!"
He tossed the chalk onto the rack beneath the board, employing a needless flourish as he did so. He then spun, stretching his arms wide, to face his "class."
"You see, my fine friends, love is a difficult thing, but can be reduced to very simple mechanics. As you can see from the board," full of scribbles, bad drawings, several hearts, and CC + MC, "there are several involved formulae to employ. i highly suggest using Shakespeare's equation:
"Man + woman = love, but only if X, representing an outside force does not act upon either M (man) or W (woman). In that case, you must employ the Puck algorithm, which states that all mortals are foolish. Therefore the outside force will either rend M from W, or bring M an' W together to form LC (lovely couple)."
Cal nodded, templed his fingers, and addressed his class. Somewhere, probably from hammer space, Cal had gotten a hold of a pair of scholarly glasses, which he now removed and pointed at the class.
"Are there any questions?"
The classrooms were generally empty whenever a class wasn't being held. Devoid of anything resembling life, except for, perhaps, the scuttle of an insect or small mammal.
Cal had counted on this.
His loyal squad of animals: Twiddle the duck, Twitch the Ferret (also known as Flyff), and Jolt the turtle sat on or near desks. Jolt had clearly gotten confused, and wandered off his seat. Now he lay on his back on the floor, stubby legs kicking the air. Twiddle just looked confused. Twitch looked bored.
"Now, today we're going to go over the advanced mechanics behind love. I call it..."
Cal underlined a huge word on a huge blackboard:
"LOVECANICS!"
He tossed the chalk onto the rack beneath the board, employing a needless flourish as he did so. He then spun, stretching his arms wide, to face his "class."
"You see, my fine friends, love is a difficult thing, but can be reduced to very simple mechanics. As you can see from the board," full of scribbles, bad drawings, several hearts, and CC + MC, "there are several involved formulae to employ. i highly suggest using Shakespeare's equation:
"Man + woman = love, but only if X, representing an outside force does not act upon either M (man) or W (woman). In that case, you must employ the Puck algorithm, which states that all mortals are foolish. Therefore the outside force will either rend M from W, or bring M an' W together to form LC (lovely couple)."
Cal nodded, templed his fingers, and addressed his class. Somewhere, probably from hammer space, Cal had gotten a hold of a pair of scholarly glasses, which he now removed and pointed at the class.
"Are there any questions?"
