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Post by ĸara вelova★ on May 24, 2010 14:21:18 GMT -5
"I know you're not like that," Kara said, tone making it sound as though he'd just stated the obvious. Despite her tendency to flee, she did as instructed, and stiffly laid back next to him. Though there was the barrier of the blanket between them, she could feel the heat of his skin the longer they lay together.
She stared up at the ceiling, mind whirling as she thought of what she was doing. Kara wasn't that kind of the girl, the easily to seduce ones. If Leo tried, he'd have a difficult time, but they both knew what he could say to get her to consider it. But she didn't want to, and she didn't want him to. But at the same time if he tried it would let her know she wasn't as hideous as she knew she was. Conflicted, her body remained board-straight. She was unable to relax with him lying right there, so casual and calm.
She decided to borrow some of his cool, and reached out with her empathy to feel what he was experiencing. She was surprised to learn he was a little uncomfortable too, but the anxiety didn't feel like dread or regret. Leo was just better at pretending everything was normal. So instead of being able to share his indifference, she took his lead and relaxed, just a bit, so that her knees at least bent and her back curved to the mattress.
She was silent for a long moment before she declared, "This is weird."
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Post by Leogare Lasteulf on May 26, 2010 9:56:49 GMT -5
Leo smiled at her obvious comment. "Well...if you're having trouble sleeping with your nightmares, I can go find you a teddy bear?" He teased her. He was going to get her mind off of this, one way or the other.
Leo knew he was the one that was likely to fall asleep here, Kara would probably stay up all night running circles in her head. But hey, he could at least attempt to make the girl calm down. "Just relax and sleep, maybe it'll be a better dream this time around." He suggested.
The silence was slightly awkward, but around Kara everything kind of was.
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Post by ĸara вelova★ on May 30, 2010 19:55:04 GMT -5
"What nightmares?" Kara asked, sounding defensive. She hadn't mentioned her nightmares. Leo claimed not to have telepathy but sometimes she wondered. Was he really that observant? She didn't give him enough credit, apparently. She turned to look at him, but as always refused to look him in the eye. It wasn't a sign she was lying, it was just Kara. Besides, whenever her blue eyes met someone else's, a weird shock ran through her. Leo was no exception. Actually, that shock was even more powerful. It made her stomach twist and her chest pinch. He couldn't be very healthy for her.
She could have come to him, upset about anything. What had she done to suggest she'd had a nightmare? Her suspicions crept back to her... was the language her murderer spoke in German? Paranoia plagued her and she went rigid. Again she was ready to leap off the bed at the slightest push. Her poor mind was racing, trying to convince her that Leo was untrustworthy, that he wasn't here to save her, to comfort her. That he was the bad guy, and she was doomed to die alone.
Damn, she was twisted.
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Post by Leogare Lasteulf on Jun 1, 2010 17:22:33 GMT -5
Leo sighed slightly and rolled over to face Kara, even if she wasn't going to face him.
"Come on Kar, I'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer, but I'm not stupid. Half the girls dorm woke up screaming at once, and you find your way here screaming at me and asking if I killed you. So, what if someone with the ability to make other people feel fear had a nightmare? I think it makes perfect sense, but what do I know."
He continued staring at her, though she hadn't yet met his gaze. "Still gonna deny it? Not like I can mock you for your subconscious, I still have nightmares my self. Now come on, stop getting all worked up. I'm not here to kill you, or take advantage of you either. So just relax girl, you're gonna give yourself an ulcer."
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Post by ĸara вelova★ on Jun 1, 2010 17:41:22 GMT -5
His easy way of talking irritated her. She scowled, only after she decided he was telling the truth. She tried to tell her paranoia to screw off, but it still lingered. His eyes on her made her self-conscious, and she tugged her nightgown down. She still refused to look at him though.
"Okay..." She couldn't really argue with his logic. She should have given him more credit. The pretty boy could think. Pretty? Did she really think that? She sneaked a look at him but her eyes darted away almost too quickly for her brain to register. No. Eiji had been pretty. Leo was... how to describe him? Guapo. A sort of rugged beauty that boasted masculinity. Kara sniffed when he warned her of the ulcer.
"Going to die, anyway," She murmured more to herself than him, but the room was so quiet she may as well have been speaking to the boy. Admitting it out loud, again, with a definitive, reluctant tone made it too realistic. As pathetic and as uncharacteristic as it was, she kind of wanted a hug. Not kind of. Really. She really, really wanted a hug. But alas, Kara was too introverted to initiate anything. And too uncertain of herself to ask. So she kept to herself, staying silent and still. Though she was much more relaxed than before, whether that be from her accepting Leo was NOT her murderer, or taking his easy-going advice, or a mixture of both.
Just be who you want to be, She told herself, and genuinely took a moment to think about what she wanted. Do what you want to do. It sounded like crappy advice from a teenage rom-com, but it had never sounded more appealing to her in her entire life. Leo was slowly convincing her that dying quietly wasn't an attractive option. Why not make some noise? Figuratively, of course...
"Can you..." just say it! "...maybe..." say it, damnit! "..." ASK!
Kara took a deep breath, turned on her side so she was facing him, and looked him in the eye.
"Please kiss me again."
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Post by Leogare Lasteulf on Jun 2, 2010 18:50:44 GMT -5
Now she was confusing him, firstly she admitted he was right, a rarity in and of itself. Secondly, she got...depressed? Not angst depressed, but 'about-to-cry' depressed.
Kara Belova did not cry.
But then, even more unexpected. She began to talk, and looked as if she was trying to say something. Then she turned to face him, and boy did she say it. He'd been trying to get her to ask for anything, his help, a date, anything. And now she asked for something like this, boy she was really crumbling down. Her wall was coming down, and he would be waiting to greet who was on the other side.
Without a word of reply he shifted closer to her, their bodies nearly touched in the small bed. He wrapped an arm around her, and pressed close to her very softly. The connection of their lips was soft, barely counting as a touch. Leo was curious as to how far she would take this contact, and he was going to let her set the pace for the act of passion.
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Post by ĸara вelova★ on Jun 2, 2010 21:22:05 GMT -5
As soon as Leo decided to oblige, everything moved in slow motion. His careful repositioning, the hand between her shoulder blades, the growing heat of his torso just an inch away... and then the pressure of his lips on hers, and her eyes closed without permission.
Then everything was sensation. The heat flared and seized her entire body, making the blanket around her unnecessary. Her lips responded to his by opening ever so slightly. Her hands came loose from the blanket and one pressed against his chest, the other timidly lifted to cup his jaw. Kara took a breath in, pulled back, and gently touched her forehead to his chin. She let the breath out, tickling his chest, before tilting her head back so she could look at him again. This wasn't awful. Not at all. And she wanted to do it again.
It made her feel alive.
So she squirmed closer and pressed her lips to his. She wasn't aggressive, but neither was she conservative. It was just a girl kissing a boy, and if today was one of her last, she was determined to make it memorable.
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Post by Leogare Lasteulf on Jun 3, 2010 21:04:20 GMT -5
Kara's response to the kiss was invigorating. Like it was the greatest sensation in the world, some sort of forbidden joy she was never to taste. And now that she had gotten a taste, she came back for more.
When she initiated the third kiss, Leo pressed on a bit more fire into it. He wrapped his arms around her back and deepened the kiss. He was quite curious as to how far Kara would let him go, it would be interesting to find out.
Kara had always been confusing, she'd always been reserved. And now at last, she was breaking free. Leo really liked what he saw now, because this showed just how alive Kara could really be.
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Post by ĸara вelova★ on Jun 6, 2010 15:55:49 GMT -5
When Leo treated her like this, she didn't feel hideous anymore. With his arms around her and his lips on hers, she felt like the most beautiful girl in the world. How had this happened?
They went from one inch apart to no inch apart, and Kara's arms had broken free from the blanket to wrap around Leo's neck. Her breathing was uneven while she kissed him, all hesitancy forgotten. Leo might be curious to see how far she'd take this, but Kara didn't even know the answer to that question. As they kissed, Kara let her mind blank. She let the passion between them burn away her worries until all she could think of was Leo's lips against hers.
The brunette dropped her elbow between them and broke his embrace behind her back. She pulled back from the kiss just long enough to unwrap the blanket and toss it aside. Then after a couple shallow breaths, she resumed their most recent activity and kissed him again. This time so forcefully that she actually pushed him over, tumbling on top as a result.
"Oh!" She usually didn't react when she was surprised, but all her usual defenses were down. Leo was glimpsing an unguarded Kara Belova, wide-eyed and shocked at her own behaviour. The tiny nightgown was pulled tight over her body from their shift in position, and she felt self-conscious again. She was half a second away from shutting down and restarting the system so she would reboot as the near-android Leo was accustomed to. But then she looked down at Leo's face, and felt the jolt when their eyes connected.
"..."
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Post by Leogare Lasteulf on Jun 7, 2010 21:00:49 GMT -5
Leo was pleasantly surprised when Kara pushed him down to the bed, now straddling him practically. The amount of passion she had been releasing had been intoxicating for him, such a unique feeling to experience the pure emotions of a girl who kept them hidden away. When she broke and looked down at him, Leo knew what was happening. She was calming down, she was losing that passion and returning to reason.
Reason sucked, it was no fun. And so Leo grabbed her shoulder and pulled her back into another passionate kiss. This one was short though, as he released it and then began placing kisses along her neck.
She was so arousing right now. And he wanted to make sure she felt every degree of the heat he did, as he rapidly began losing his self control.
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Post by ĸara вelova★ on Jun 8, 2010 10:30:05 GMT -5
She wasn't straddling him completely - if she was, it would soon be obvious that she wore nothing under the nightgown - but she was definitely in the dominant position. As her mind struggled to make her heart see reason, she watched a sort of resolve seize Leo.
And then Leo seized her. He pulled her down for another kiss, and she automatically protested losing the control. But then his mouth traveled south of her lips, and every kiss on her neck sent shockwaves down her spine all the way to her toes. Her breathing grew heavy, and she found herself becoming vocal. The moment her first sigh escaped her lips, reality came crashing down on her. Kara always had such intense self-control. This involuntary slip made her realize how dangerous this was. How dangerous Leo was. How dangerous she was.
"No!" She squirmed off him and pushed herself away, off the bed. She just wanted to become invisible, but her body was firing off too many signals and it was confusing her camouflage. So she stood there, her flushed cheeks and pained expression visible for Leo to interpret. Kara busied herself with adjusting her nightgown, pulling down on the hem so it covered a little more of her thighs.
This was an accident. This was a mistake. Giving up on the hem, Kara wrapped her arms around herself tightly, clasping her shoulders in a death grip. She couldn't bring herself to look at the boy who inspired so many conflicting feelings within her. Leo was someone she envied but desired, admired but begrudged.
And so she became defensive.
"You may not have killed me the first time, but it'll be you this time around," She retreated to the door slowly, not turning her back, still hugging herself as though she was the only stable part of her life.
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Post by Leogare Lasteulf on Jun 8, 2010 21:38:55 GMT -5
Leo wasn't that surprised when Kara shouted no and pushed herself off of him, frankly he'd been expecting it. But expecting the rejection didn't make it hurt less. He looked up at Kara from where he was, as she attempted to shield herself from him. That was enough for tonight, he didn't have the patience to deal with her anymore. He'd shown her a little bit of life, of what she could experience in it.
And if she wanted another taste, she'd have to seek him out this time. He was done with chasing this ghost for now, no now it was her turn to grow up and go after what she wanted.
And Leo knew she wanted him, she was just too scared to pursue him.
"If that's the way you feel, I guess you should go get some rest. I'll see you later I suppose." He threw on a shirt, grabbed his jacket in one hand, and walked over to the window. He opened it and stared out the window as the chill air filled the room.
"Sleep well." He said without looking at her, placing a foot on the windowsill and prepping to jump.
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Post by ĸara вelova★ on Jun 9, 2010 18:09:14 GMT -5
Kara was just so accustomed to being the victim, and she was so absorbed in her own short life, she never considered what her actions might do to Leo.
He was the first boy she genuinely cared about who returned her feelings. It was such a foreign situation for her, and adjusting was more than difficult. So while she turned to defensive maneuvers, her empathetic reception kicked in, and she felt the hurt Leo was experiencing. And how did he respond to this pain? He fled.
"W-where are you going?" Her voice sounded small even to herself, "I..." I don't want to be alone, she wanted to say, but admitting it aloud would mean Leo would have to reply. And what if he didn't care? After all his talk about not wanting her to die alone, what if she'd hurt him enough that he took back those feelings? Kara knew more than anyone else how easily some feelings could be revoked. With her luck, Leo would jump out the window and run into some blonde and take off into the sunset. Or rather, sunrise at this time of day/night.
She shivered again as the breeze from the window wrapped around her. "I'm just... nervous..." It was easier to admit than the truth. And the more she thought about it, she wasn't really lying. Leo made her anxious, and she could tell (to a lesser extent) that she made Leo jittery too. She looked so pathetic, standing in the middle of his room, so fragile in that barely-there white dress. Her arms dropped to her sides, and her expression revealed so much more than her words ever would.
Please don't leave! She wanted to cry, I can't be alone tonight.
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Post by Leogare Lasteulf on Jun 10, 2010 16:50:35 GMT -5
Leo turned, his foot still on the window sill as he watched her. This was leaps and bounds of progress for her, he shouldn't be mean in return for it. So he took his foot off of the window sill and closed it. He didn't face her yet.
"I told you before, I'm not a rapist. If you wanted me to stop, you only had one word to say and it would be so." He then turned to face her. "I'm not sure what your past is, or why you think I'm going to be the death of you. But the way I see it, you don't have anything to lose through life. You don't want to do any more tonight? Fine, no problem. But don't..."
Leo looked away. "I don't enjoy being called a....murderer..."
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Post by ĸara вelova★ on Jun 10, 2010 22:30:55 GMT -5
She winced when he mentioned 'rapist'. She hadn't intended to make him feel that way. And then as he turned and spoke directly to her, she actually felt ashamed for her actions. She hadn't come here with the intention of playing with Leo's emotions, and she wound up doing just that. Tormenting him with no aide from her empathetic projection. When he couldn't look at her, she automatically took a step forward.
"I didn't mean..." She didn't want this to happen. This wasn't where she saw the night going. Actually, she had no idea where the night was supposed to go from here. Everything was up in the air, but for now it appeared Leo wouldn't leave her. Not yet. She took some comfort in that, but also took action to solidify that possibility.
"I want to... be with you," It was vague, perhaps too vague, and she stumbled for the right words, "You are so different. I don't know what I'm... I want to... but not like this. I wish I was... different too..." She couldn't spit it out. How did she tell him that she felt unworthy? That she knew she was hideous like this, a living skeleton. No one would want her, and she couldn't dare hope that Leo's patience and attraction would persist if that nightgown was removed. She absent-mindedly pulled the hem down. She wished she was healthy, fuller. There were days when she could almost admit she was pretty, but those days were far away. Were Leo's standards so low that he would take her as she was now? A shivering, dying mess of a girl who once held such power over him.
Yes, she wanted to be with him. But not tonight. Not like this. How could she explain that to him? Would he care? Would he wait? She didn't know if she was ready to hear his answers, and so she bit back the questions.
"I don't think that you're a murderer."
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